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Archive for May, 2007

In The Musicals

Wednesday, May 23rd, 2007

One of my friends asked me recently what my top 10 albums from the 90s list would look like. It would look very much like this (in no particular order):

The next day someone else asked me what my top 10 music videos list would be like. Well since I am all about this internet thing the kids are so fond of, I will include links so you can experience these for yourself. There are a few that you shouldn’t watch at work though!

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Let’s Watch La-Mulana

Tuesday, May 15th, 2007

Let me tell you the story of DeceasedCrab. He is an enterprising young Something Awful forum goon who decided to do a video play-thru o a freeware PC game called La-Mulana. There is already one play-thru video series on Youtube, but the interesting part about DeceasedCrab’s is that for one, he is an average player, so you’re not going to see someone breeze through the game as if it were nothing, and two, he talks the whole time. Sometimes that can get a little annoying, but now that he has reached the optional ultra hard sadistic area after the end of the game, this is key. You can listen to a man lose his ever loving mind. If you ever wanted to just sit back and watch as a man descends into madness, this is the place. I’ve embedded the (as of today) newest video, which showcases some insane laughing, but not too many death screams, which are coming more and more frequently. So go check out DeceasedCrab’s youtube profile to follow this journey from the beginning. Fight! For the children!

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Keep On Truckin’

Thursday, May 3rd, 2007

Recently I’ve been having some increasingly odd dreams. I thought I would share one of the three I remember fairly clearly today, and the others at some point in the near future:

I was working at a major trucking company, one of the biggest in the country. No, not that one. I don’t know what it was called, but that wasn’t important. I didn’t have time to worry about things like that because I was embroiled in a battle to save this company from the brink of disaster.

Trucking is, at it’s core, something most people don’t want to think about. Tractor trailers are things to be avoided on the highway as their drivers are often tweaked out speed freaks commanding 37 tons of metal and rubber and gas and hate at a million miles per hour.

BUT NO MORE MY FRIENDS!

To combat this negative image I propose a change in the aesthetic values trucking has been to this point based upon. We will replace the depressing gray boxes that intimidate and disgust motorists with epic works of stained glass. A thirty foot cube of dazzling craftsmanship, designed to improve the driving experience for both truckers and everyday motorists alike. Each trailer unique and beautiful, like a snowflake, bending the light in a thousand directions.

The cost you say? Costs be damned. We’re talking about wrestling this flagging industry from the edge of a bottomless pit. Accidents? If nothing else the scene would be a work of unparalleled art.

WHAT SAY YOU GENTLEMEN?

Will you decide to bring this industry to the next level, or allow it to languish in this increasingly dangerous quagmire?

To tell you the truth, I was totally aware that even one accident would probably bankrupt the company, as the trailers put a considerable economic strain on the company as it was. Having to replace what essentially was a one of a kind work of art would have surely lead to complete financial ruin. Still, I had to stick to my guns or these stereotypically balding executives would have eaten me alive.

Unfortunately I woke up before any definite decision could be reached, but I could see the tide starting to turn, and even had a few backers among the stuffed shirts in the room. I stand by my decision though, if trucks were hauling recycled cans in a stained glass cube I think people would just be happier as they drove down the road. At least I would be.

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