Klassic Krazy
Posted on August 10, 2004
As if to make up for the past few days of peace and quiet, today had a bunch of strangeness at everyone’s favorite Fiend Video. I heard about the branch that is closing on King St. in VA from both the owner of the “chain” of two (now one) stores, and my manager. Apparently the VA store catered to “adult males” which meant they had over 800 porn DVDs (we only have a meager 250). On the subject of selling off the movies, the owner informed us that he would “rather throw them away then sell them for a few cents profit.” Fun! Then, someone called to ask me if a “video-film” they returned was checked in. If that doesn’t mean anything to you I suggest you watch Home Movies on Adult Swim before they take it off the air again.
The main course of crazy today though was a potential coworker. He came in to talk to Dan about when he should start working, etc. BUT, then he stuck around for about an hour, just bumming around the store and making me hate my job even more, which is saying something. He is either slightly retarded or REALLY crazy, I can’t decide which, but he had so many quality quotes I actually started to write notes down. Here you go:
- # of times he mentioned getting a VHS copy of The Rundown AS SOON AS POSSIBLE (none are available at the store now): 34
- # of times he asked me if we had Icon vs Icon: The Rock vs Hulk Hogan (we don’t AND I couldn’t find it on IMDB either): 77
From here it gets more complex. He apparently worked for the Knights of Columbus, and was offered to “take over” the organization. HOWEVER. He told them he was not “ready for the big chair.” This was emphasized by the fact that he repeated “not ready for the big chair” 5 times in a row. This lead into a discussion of politics. When this guy came in my manager was involved in a long political discussion with a customer. My crazyman told me I should NEVER discuss politics at the workplace, and he was PROUD to see I didn’t get involved. I capitalize those words because he puts extreme emphasis on some words, seemingly randomly. Then he told me the important thing was to “go where the money is” (we get minimum wage) and to find out where people’s LOYALTIES lie (not with Fiend Video). When he heard I was going to Japan he said “but…don’t you need a PASSPORT for THAT?” like it was a major feat to have a passport. Then he said he was “concerned to hear” I was going overseas since Japan is such a hotbed of terrorist activity apparently. So when I started to crack up at this point he told me to “seriously watch my BACK” and assured me “being alive is better than being DEAD.” Damn straight man, you really opened my eyes. So in the middle of all this my manager just looks at me and says “I feel like I’m making a mistake here somehow.” Good thinking man, enjoy getting out of this one. The only question we’re left with is where do YOUR loyalties lie??
